
It is still October, the month of Halloween, and a new scarecrow has been added to Slim’s Menagerie of Miscellaneous Monsters
means to secure against hurt, loss, or damage. And Fubar has an official legal document, prepared by an actual lawyer, to indemnify him against the consequences of wishing on a monkey' paw.
And, as promised, here is that official legal document:
DEED OF WISH AND INDEMNITY AGREEMENT
THIS AGREEMENT is made between FUBAR (hereinafter "Wisher") and THE FATE OF THE UNIVERSE (hereinafter "Fate"), regarding the instrument known as THE MONKEY'S PAW (hereinafter "the Instrument").
RECITALS
ARTICLE 1 – DEFINITIONS
1.1 "deceased" means SNAFU, restored in a state of full biological integrity, cognitive function, and emotional continuity as of the moment prior to his death.
1.2 "Consequences" means any and all of: mutilation, decomposition, haunting, psychological trauma, financial liability, metaphysical punishment or generally being annoyed.
ARTICLE 2 – THE WISH
Wisher hereby wishes: "That SNAFU shall return to life, whole, healthy, and as he was, and no harm shall come to family, friends, or readers of PESKY GREMLINS as a result."
ARTICLE 3 – LIMITATIONS & EXCLUSIONS
3.1 The Instrument shall not grant the wish in a manner that alters the body of SNAFU with the exception wherein body alterations could be construed as improvements.
3.2 The Instrument shall not impose any toll, payment, or equivalent loss upon Wisher, friends, or reappearing characters.
3.3 SNAFU's return shall not constitute a violation of natural law that triggers retaliatory supernatural action.
ARTICLE 4 – INDEMNIFICATION
Fate shall indemnify Wisher against all claims, damages, and existential harm arising from the wish.
ARTICLE 5 – GOVERNING LAW
This Agreement shall be governed by the laws of fate itself, and any dispute shall be resolved by the original fakir, acting as arbitrator.
ARTICLE 6 – SEVERABILITY
If any provision is found to be impossible to enforce by the Instrument, the remaining provisions shall remain in effect.
IN WITNESS WHEREOF, the parties have executed this Deed.
The paw, upon being squeezed, remains motionless.
SCHEDULE A – DEFINITION OF "WHOLE" (ATTACHMENT)
|
Body Part |
Condition |
|
Head |
Attached. Functional. Recognizable. |
|
Torso |
Intact. Not decomposing. |
|
Arms |
Two. Attached at shoulders. |
|
Legs |
Two. Attached at hips. |
|
Spine |
Aligned. Not "crawling posture." |
|
Face |
As original. Not "something else." |
|
Odor |
None. |
|
Temperature |
98.6°F. |
|
Respiration |
Present. |
|
Consciousness |
Present. |
|
Memory |
Continuous with life prior to death. |

It is still October, the month of Halloween, and a new scarecrow has been added to Slim’s Menagerie of Miscellaneous Monsters

Since October is the month of Halloween, a new ghost has been added to Slim’s Menagerie of Miscellaneous Monsters

Slim, the world’s most famous plastic glow-in-the-dark skeleton is coming to Pesky Gremlins in October with another twisted Halloween tale.

A classic 1959 Cadillac is today’s featured image and it can be found in the Assorted Vehicles Gallery

Today’s featured image is an illustration of a the might Jaguar V-12 Engine. It can be found in the Jaguar E-type Illustration Gallery

Today’s featured image is an ink illustration of an AMC Gremlin. This image and more AMC Gremlins can be found in the AMC Gremlin Illustration Gallery.

Today’s featured image is an ink rendering of a C2 Corvette Convertible. This image and many more can be found in the Corvette Gallery.

Today’s featured image is an ink illustration of a Jaguar E-type Series III convertible. It can be found in the Jaguar E-type Illustration

An Amazoogle Delivery Truck image has been added to the Assorted Vehicles Gallery

A new image of a WWI Zeppelin-Staaken R.VI bomber has been added to the the World War I Aircraft Gallery